Just Call Me Buddy

I don't usually look forward to Christmas. I like it ok, but it's a lots of work! The decorating, the gift buying, food, house cleaning for guests-it wears me out. Last year we took a break from the whole thing and went on vacation for Christmas. Santa filled the kids stockings in our hotel room, but we didn't put up a tree or many decorations at all. It was nice, but I guess I got my second wind because this year I feel like Will Ferrell in Elf. It's not even December yet and our house is lit up inside and out. There are gifts stashed, lists made, hot glue blisters and glitter stuck in my hair.
This is the current state of my living room (as I sit here typing). You may not be able to see the layer of glitter covering the floor, but I assure you it's there!

I wanted to have a spectacular mantle this year. I painted and glittered 4 wine bottles (FYI I didn't drink them, although my finished wreath may convince you otherwise). They were so fun and sparkly, that I guess I didn't want the project to end. And that's about where I lost my mind. Actually, according to our good friend and nanny, I lost it yesterday when I let my children put a lost dog in the car. What's another craft project littering up the house when there's a strange dog shedding in the back seat. (By the way, if I weren't already a person of faith, I would have become one real quick as I realized I had no idea whether or not the animal I was toting would get car sick! Prayer was my only lifeline) Anyway, I made these lovelies and decided the wreath above the mantle would not work at all with the wine bottles.  The old silver wreath was far too small for the space, and it lacked the pizzazz of the red bottles. So I reconfigured it into a bright, fun monstrosity. I used mesh ribbon, picks, wire ribbon, glass ornaments, and about 9,000 sticks of hot glue. I even hand painted scroll on the ornaments because I have a sickness. It's called Obsessive Compulsive Crafting Disorder (OCCD) My husband had no words for it-the wreath, not my sickness. He has plenty of words for that. He just said "ok, Honey." I tried to tell him how much a wreath like this would cost if I ordered it ready made off the internet. He wasn't impressed. He replied, "there are a lot of things on the internet I wouldn't pay money for!" Even though I agree that it looks a bit like Christmas threw up on our wall, it coordinates well with the rest of the mantle, and it's very mod! If you don't believe me, just check Pinterest.

before

the entire Christmas section of Hobby Lobby on one wall!

Now I'm going to clean up my mess and move on to setting up the snow village! By December 25 I will be burned out again. In fact, this may become the house that is Santa-ready year round! Not because I love it so much but because the thought of taking everything down is starting to give me a stomach ache. In case you are thinking of decorating your own wine bottles, check with me for empties first because the more I sit here and think about what I've gotten myself into, the more likely I am to have plenty to spare. 

Please Santa, Bring Super Glue

I'm borrowing most of this from an article I wrote for something else last week, but since it's mine, I guess I am allowed. After all, it's relevant to the season, and as I am just about to super glue this pitiful victim back together, I need to vent, or re-vent about the pitfalls of decorating with kids.

As I’m writing this, my husband and I have just come in from putting up our lights. This job always takes twice as long as we think it’s going to and leaves us frustrated as strands randomly flicker off or don’t fit where they’re supposed to go. And somehow there are never enough stakes to fasten lights around the perimeter of the grass, and we have to go buy more. Every year!

Tonight while we were intensely driving wire stakes into the rock hard ground and carefully removing busted bulbs from their sockets (swearing under my breath when I trip and squash yet another bulb), a silver Christmas ball bounced off the porch and rolled down the sidewalk. It had fallen off the wreath on the door after the children had opened it and shut it for about the 90^th time to see if we were done yet. At least it bounced instead of shattered.

We have a designated spot that we call the “ornament hospital” where I keep super glue handy for repairs. I’m pretty sure we have more ornaments on our tree that have been glued back together than ones that have yet to need glue. It's gotten so bad that next year I think we may wrap the whole tree in bubble wrap. Wait, then all I'll hear for weeks in popping. Never mind.

We even have a wise man that had to have his hand reattached after an unfortunate incident where the nativity set was tossed out of the attic. Don’t ask, we don’t like to talk about it.

It’s not so bad to have to a house full of repaired Christmas decorations though as long as I refrain from gluing my fingers together in the process. Sadly though, I seem to do it every time. Besides, House Beautiful is unlikely to come photograph my holiday décor. If they did though, the saggy gingerbread house would be a must see. It was the messiest thing to make, and I will still be sweeping up sprinkles in a month, but my kids are so proud of their little house. It doesn’t matter to them one bit that the roof slid halfway off, the door is crooked, and they got more icing on the table than on the house. They loved making it, and the memories they will have of fun Christmas traditions will mean so much more to them as they grow up than having a perfectly decorated home. Who cares if a Lego man has to stand in for our missing Baby Jesus? This reminds me, I still need retrieve a shepherd from above the cabinets where he was launched last year.